Absolutely Abby
by Gail Cregg
Summary: One-shots featuring Abby."Occasionally eccentric but always reliable."
1. UnAbby

Author's Note: Most of my one-shots are about our favourite forensic scientist so I thought I'd collect them together.

* * *

UN-ABBY.

_"Abby's unhappy?" "No, Abby's un-Abby." _Ziva & Tony in Skeletons.

NCIS Squad Room.

"Hey Tony nice threads. Is that a new suit?"  
"Yeah, thanks." Trust Abby to notice a detail like that Tony thinks as she continues over to McGee's desk. She appeared to be more cheerful than she had been the rest of the week he observes. He had been worried about her after the mini-meltdown she had over the vending machine and her dollar but she wouldn't talk to him. Then the Boss had talked to her and told them she would be fine. Despite this Tony thought she'd been a bit subdued and not quite her usual exuberant self so instead of the paperwork he was meant to be finishing he turned his attention to the problem of how to cheer Abby up.

NCIS Carpark. End of the day.

"Hey Abs! Wait up." Tony hurries across the carpark to where Abby is standing by her hearse.  
"What is it? Don't tell me it's a case. I really want to go home."  
"No, it's nothing like that."  
"Well what is it then?" she asks tersely.  
"Have you got plans tonight?"  
"Nothing fixed. I was thinking of meeting some friends who are going to this new club or...."  
"Good. You're coming with me." He takes her hand and starts to pull her towards his car.  
"Tony! What are we doing?"  
"You'll see." He grins at her and giving in she gets into his car. "Now put this on." He hands her a blindfold. She grins back. "So as not to spoil the surprise right?" "Right". She puts it on.

A Nearby Park.

Tony helps her out of the car and leads her a short distance away. "O.K. Blindfold off."  
Abby removes the blindfold and turns to him with a big grin when she sees where they are. She rushes over to sit on one of the swings in front of them. Abby starts to swing and for a few minutes she swings in silence as he watches smiling.  
"Wheeeeee! This is amazing. I can't believe you remembered." She slows down and looks up at him curiously. "I mean it was." She thinks a moment. "It was after that case at Halloween. That was _months_ ago." Tony looks embarrassed.  
"Well you were so passionate about it that it stuck in my mind." He tries to dismiss it as nothing.

At the conclusion of the case they had taken the child involved around the desks at NCIS to get some Halloween candy. Then later at the bar after a few celebratory drinks the team had moved on from Halloween memories to other childhood ones. Abby had made them all smile by describing trips to the park with her parents and brother and the wonderful feeling of almost being able to fly when she was on a swing. The total freedom of the experience.

"This was a great idea. Thank you. There's just one more thing that would make this perfect."  
"What?" He is desperately hoping she'll reply icecream or something like that but knowing her as he does he accurately anticipates her reply.  
"Someone to swing with." She grins a wickedly Abby grin at him.  
"Abby! You know this is a new suit. This is the first time I've worn it."  
"Come on."  
He takes a last look at the swing and his friend sitting before him. It might spoil his suit but if it would make her smile...  
DiNozzo sits down and starts to swing. "Bet I can go higher than you."  
"Bet you can't."  
As they start to swing Tony forgets his suit and Abby her worries. It is almost as if they are simply two children playing on the swings.

I have to thank the writers of Bones for the swing idea. Thanks guys!


	2. The Great Hipponapping

THE GREAT HIPPONAPPING.

Abby's Lab.

Abby walks into her lab and begins her morning routine, hanging up her coat and hat, storing her lunch, switching on her machines and savoring the taste of the first Caf-Pow of the day. Then it is time for the next ritual of the morning getting some hippo love and she looks around the lab for Bert. That's odd she thinks finding him next to Major Mass Spec I hardly ever leave him in here. Usually he was within easy reach of her desk in case she needed a hug throughout the day and quite often she took him home with her so he wouldn't be lonely left in the lab overnight but the end of the previous workday had been totally crazy and she'd left him behind.

She'd been trying to make sure she left on time as it was the grand final of the bowling league and she'd wanted plenty of time to go home and change and make it to the alley without rushing. However the Bossman had come down with half an hour remaining wanting to go over the toxicology report with her and it seemed to take him longer than normal to understand her explanation meaning she had to repeat herself a couple of times. Gibbs finally got it then McGee arrived saying he had to do something and instead of traveling with her would meet her at the alley and _where _was it again. She'd still managed to leave on time but had been a little rushed. Matters weren't helped by Ziva calling as she got to her car to wish her luck and then Tony called with all sorts of useless advice. She'd made it to the alley and the team had won so it had all worked out in the end.

Abby picks up Bert for his morning hug and he lets out his usual farting noise. Hang on a minute she thinks. She hugs him again with the same result. That was not his usual noise. After examining the hippo closely she realises it is not Bert. Someone had hipponapped her hippo and tried to fool her with a fake. How dare they! Who would be so cruel? Fortunately she knew that she had the real Bert yesterday so her baby had not been in the hands of this evil person for long but it was still long enough that damage could have been done.

So who would want to steal Bert and why? There was no way it was Gibbs. He knew how much Bert meant to her and how important he was in lightening her load when she was having a bad day and how he comforted her when she was working on a horrific case.

McGee knew this too and he had been at the alley with her and celebrating afterwards with the nuns (she smiles reminiscently - those girls sure knew how to party) but maybe he had time beforehand. What had his mysterious errand been? But why would McGee take Bert? Maybe it was payback for the little stunt she'd pulled a couple of weeks ago. She had been bored and decided to reverse his mouse buttons so that clicking the left button did what clicking the right usually did and vice-versa. It had taken him half the morning to realise what the problem was and would've taken him even longer to fix if she hadn't taken pity on him. He hadn't mentioned MIT once since then.

Ziva? No, she could not think of anything she had done lately to upset NCIS's newest member and anyway this was way too subtle for the Israeli assassin. If it had been Ziva she was sure she would have found nothing in her lab but hippo skin.

Jimmy was way too scared of her to even think about it so that left only one team member and it all started to make sense. Childish prank? Yes. For no obvious reason? Yes. Well executed? Someone had used a fake hippo so again yes. It had to be Tony. But why? And did he have help? She'd have put money on it that the Senior Field Agent had got either Ziva or McGee to watch his six.

This was going to be hard to prove as with no Bert and nothing resembling a ransom note as yet she had no forensics to work with so she was going to have to interrogate the team to find the answers and get her hippo back. It was time to lose her investigative virginity. Special Agent Sciuto was on the case.

NCIS Elevator.

Abby bounces cheerfully into the elevator and Ziva looks startled.  
"What did you get up to last night Officer David?"  
"I was with a friend."  
"Doing what?"  
"Ah, we were" Ziva is interrupted by Tony entering the elevator.  
"Watching movies" she says in a relieved tone.  
The elevator stops and Abby exits leaving Tony and Ziva behind. The doors close.  
"I think she suspects something."  
"What, no way!" Tony replies confidently.  
"We need to talk about this."  
"Oh O.K."

NCIS Squad Room – Later that day. Abby is still on the case.

"What did you get up to last night Boss?'  
"Why do you want to know Abs?"  
"You missed the bowling final."  
"The Director called me in for a meeting."  
That's him alibied she thinks now what about my main suspect.  
"Hey Tony. Where were you last night?"  
"With a friend" he responds grinning.  
"And what _were_ you and this friend doing?" she asks clearly insinuating she expects it to be something sexual.  
"Watching movies."  
"What a coincidence that was what Ziva was doing too." Her eyes light up.  
"And what was the name of this friend you were watching movies with?"  
"Ziva."  
"Oh so you two were watching movies together all evening?"  
"Yes" they reply simultaneously.  
"Oh."

Well I guess that rules them out if they were watching movies or something else (and she suspected it was something else) they couldn't have been stealing Bert. Abby returns to her lab feeling despondent. She was sure that one of them would've have given away something but they hadn't and she was no closer to having Bert returned. Maybe it was time to get back to work and see what happened next.

Abby's Lab – Much later that day.

Abby is sitting at her computer working and looking miserable.  
"What's wrong my dear?" asks Ducky entering the lab.  
"Someone hipponaped Bert. I've questioned them all and they all have alibis. No-one on the team could have done it and now I don't know what to do. I want my hippo!"  
"Shut your eyes."  
"I'm not in the mood Duckman."  
"Shut your eyes."  
"Oh alright then." She does.  
"Open them." She does to find Ducky holding out Bert to her.  
"BERT!" she takes him joyfully then glares at Ducky.  
"It was you. You took Bert. Why?"  
"Well Abby you are so talented in many areas, forensics, computing"  
"Just tell me Ducky!"  
"You can't sew. I took Bert to repair that hole in his side that was leaking stuffing and you tried to repair last week. Of course I had to get the team to help me. Gibbs and McGee distracted you so you left Bert behind, Ziva and Tony kept tabs on you with the phone calls, McGee made sure you were at the alley and then I took Bert while Ziva and Tony kept watch."  
"But they all had alibis" she muses.  
"Yeah but you left Ziva and I in the elevator together so she told me you must have found the fake hippo sooner than we expected and what her story was" says Tony entering the lab with the others.  
"That's why I'll never be a field agent. Guess I'll stick to forensics from now on. Thanks you guys that was really sweet of you."  
Abby gives Bert a big hug and he farts in his usual manner.  
The team laughs; Abby loudest of all.


	3. I Need You

I NEED YOU.

Abby's Lab.

"Abby?"

Long pause.

"I've got time" standing there as if he's got all the time in the world and not a case to work on.

"I need you."

"I'm sorry?"

"I need you."

"For…."

"I need you."

"For? Abby for?

"A hug Gibbs. I need a hug."

He hugs her.

"You only had to ask".

As Gibbs embraces Abby she feels safe and protected but most of all not alone.

* * *

In the NCIS squad room later that day. Gibbs and Abby are the only ones remaining in the office. Abby is staring at her feet as she shuffles them in front of Gibbs' desk. Gibbs looks exhausted and his desk is piled with paperwork. He is reading and looks grumpily up at her for interrupting him.

"Do you want something Abby?" he asks without the smallest hint of welcome in his tone.  
Still not looking at him and pacing back and forth she replies "About earlier..don't know what I was thinking..unprofessional...sorry..will not happen again."

Gibbs rises from his chair and by the simple expedient of taking her face in his hand forces her to stop pacing and look at him.

"Abby stop it you have nothing to apologize for. I have always been happy to help in whatever way I can when you have a problem. That is what friends do. Now, no more of this nonsense."

Abby smiles and gives him a hug. "Thanks Gibbs. How about you leave that paperwork and we grab something to eat? It'll still be there tomorrow."

Gibbs smiles. "That it will. O.K. let's go." He switches off the light and they leave the squadroom arm in arm. Once again the two friends had known exactly what each other needed and were there for each other.

_Everyone, even Goths needs a hug every now and again._


	4. Falling Screaming

FALLING SCREAMING.

Gibbs pauses for a moment in the doorway of Abby's lab observing her sleeping with her head on the bench. She is so deeply asleep that she doesn't even stir as he places the Caf-Pow beside her.

"Abs" he gently shakes her shoulder.  
"Huh. What? Gibbs!" she comes awake looking startled and scared.  
"Is something wrong Abby?" he asks tenderly.  
"Nothing. Just a silly nightmare" she shakes her head but Gibbs is unconvinced.  
He stands there a moment. "Are you going to tell me?"  
Her response comes out in a rush; words tumbling over each other as she attempts to explain.

"I was falling…falling fast….and I didn't want to be….I was reaching out….and screaming….screaming loudly and no-one….no-one…"  
"No-one what Abby? Come on you can tell me."  
"No-one heard me Gibbs. No-one heard."  
"Is something worrying you Abs?"  
"No, nothing. I guess it was just a nightmare."

He stares at her quite seriously for a moment.  
"Well I know how to make it go away."  
"You do?"  
"I promise to always hear you Abs."  
She smiles at him.  
"So what have you got for me?'  
"Well Major Mass Spec found three types of...."


	5. Her Safe Place

HER SAFE PLACE.

Crossing the almost empty carpark Gibbs is puzzled to see Abby's hearse still in its usual spot. He could not think of a reason she would be at NCIS so late especially after the week she had just had. Trusting the feeling in his gut that something wasn't right he turns around and heads back into the building.

Abby's Lab.

The room is only lit by a dim glow from the machines and it takes a moment for his eyes to adjust.  
"Abs?"  
"Gibbs." She is sitting in a corner with her knees pulled up to her chest and stroking Bert who is beside her. Gibbs crosses the room and sits in front of her.  
"What are you doing down here Abby?"  
"I had my debrief with the shrink this afternoon."

_She'd sat in that office telling the story of her and Mikel and of the guy who had tried to kill her, not for who she was Abby but simply because of her job. She had included every detail and that she knew it wasn't her fault but she hadn't felt it. It had been like she was describing something that she'd seen. Something that had happened to someone else. The session had been mandatory although she'd told everyone she was fine. Gibbs had insisted, knowing her and knowing she had to say the words out loud._

"How was it?"  
"Fine."  
He just stares at her then stands as she jumps to her feet and begins pacing.  
"Of course it wasn't fine. The guy tried to kill me Gibbs. Me! And it wasn't even about me. It was about the court case. I nearly died....nearly died...."  
He hugs her and murmurs into her hair as she lets the tears finally fall.

_She had been O.K. then and throughout the afternoon when everyone had come in to see how it had gone and if she wanted company that evening. She'd waved them all away with a smile but then found at the end of the day she didn't have the strength, she simply could not walk out the door._

_In his arms was one of her safe places. She didn't have to be strong; she could just be herself and let her fears show. As she stood there and he murmured soothing words she knew he would do anything he could to stop anyone hurting her. He may not always succeed but he would always try and still be there if things went wrong._

"I nearly died Gibbs".  
"But you didn't."  
"No. I didn't...." she muses. "_I_ stopped him._ I _took care of myself."_  
_"Better now Abs?" he queries as she steps out of his arms grinning.  
"Yeah" she replies still a little shaky. "Thanks."  
"How about we get out of here and grab something to eat?"  
"Sure. It's your turn to pay remember?"  
"Don't I always? Ow!" he reacts to her punch on his arm as they leave the lab.


	6. Missing You

A poem by Abby about one of her colleagues.

MISSING YOU.

Though there is now distance between us  
You're always _here_ in my heart  
Mere space cannot separate us  
I long to hear your voice, see your smile, tease you  
Relax and just laugh awhile  
Talk things over  
Just be together, no need for words, each simply who we are

We share a past not often spoke of  
Tragedies and celebrations, successes and failures, yours and mine  
All made the better with you by my side  
Knowing what to say and when or sometimes the value of silence.

I close my eyes for a moment and it's as if nothing's changed  
I feel your comforting presence and I know what you would say  
So I smile though my heart is aching and know I'll be O.K.  
For that is what you would want and what we have will never go away.


	7. You Walked Away

YOU WALKED AWAY.

That Night.

You spoke the words they wanted to hear  
Not like that, never like that  
For me a kiss  
Her a promise  
To all "Semper Fi!"  
Then you walked away without a doubt or a glance back  
Knowing as always what was right if only for you and not for us

I could not believe the evidence of my eyes  
That you could leave us  
With just words  
Walk away from those with whom you've shared so much  
Tragedy and laughter  
Day to day life

Reason Why.

I learnt today the reason why  
You walked away with the merest of goodbyes  
I now know the pain you've had  
The past you couldn't share  
A grief beyond imagining that led you to despair  
That made you the man you are  
I understand your need to leave and hope you'll find comfort there  
But more than that I hope and pray  
That you will return to us, your family one day.

The Return.

You came back to save her and circumstances meant you stayed  
But things have changed  
For you, for us and for them  
We cannot be to you what once we were  
As you cannot be who you once were to us  
From this comes a deeper understanding and trust  
We will find a way through, together  
Honoring the past and looking to the future.


	8. Abbycadabra

ABBYCADABRA.

Gibbs' Basement. Morning. December 23.

As usual when he has any free time Gibbs is working on his boat and enjoying the quiet. He would be spending Christmas Day with Fornell and Emily and trying to be polite to Dianne. He'd have turned Tobias down without a second thought but the FBI agent had brought Emily to invite him and surprisingly he had found his lips forming the word yes. The look on Dianne' s face when they'd told her had been priceless but as it came from Emily there was no way she could un-invite him.

Gibbs' musings are interrupted by a pounding on his front door which he ingores. Anyone he wanted to see would know to walk right in. Then as he hears the door opening and heavy boots clomping down the hall he moves over to his gun drawer only relaxing as Abby calls out as she appears at the top of the stairs.

"Hey Gibbs."  
"Hi Abby. Why did you knock?"  
"Didn't know what I might be disturbing." She grins wickedly as she walks down the stairs.  
"Fair point. I thought you were going to your brother's for Christmas?"  
"My flights not for several hours so I came by to drop off your present."  
"Abs!"  
"I know we said no buying presents this year but I _made _this and anyway that was your idea not mine." From behind her back she produces a beribboned box which she hands to him.  
"Should I open it now?" He knows for her the best part of present giving is seeing people's reactions.  
"Sure."

He takes the box over to his workbench and carefully unwraps it. Opening it he can see it is filled with several cases of dvds. Puzzled he lifts one out almost dropping it in shock as he examines it. The cover is pictures of Shannon and Kelly and it's title is Camping Trip. He looks over at Abby who is standing somewhat nervously back by the boat.

"Abs?"  
"I saw your home movies months ago when we went out for my birthday. Remember you'd been at that crime scene all day so I brought you home to change first? I wasn't prying or anything I just saw the tapes on the shelf looking rather battered. So I've been taking them home a couple at a time and cleaning them up. The tapes were really worn but with a little effort and Abby magic they're almost as good as new. Then I transferred them to dvd."

He is so touched by her gesture that he doesn't know how to respond although he knows not to hurt her feelings by telling her of the one huge flaw in her otherwise perfect gift.

"Thanks Abs". He kisses her on the cheek.

"Merry Christmas Gibbs." She gives him a big hug before bouncing up the stairs. At the top she turns and looks back. "Oh, I almost forgot." She takes out a piece of paper and waves it at him. "Step by step instructions for operating your dvd player. I'll leave them next to it on my way out. See ya in the new year."

He smiles. She knew him so well she had spotted the flaw in her present and found a way to fix it. He hoped she would like the gift he had made and sent to her brother's place weeks ago.


	9. An Ode To CafPow!

Inspired by the episode Truth or Consequences.

ODE TO CAFPOW.

_So much more than a drink_.

They present it to her, their Goth goddess as supplicants once presented gifts to ancient Queens,  
She accepts graciously as it is nothing less than her due,  
It has helped in her quest to reach the castle's keep,  
Save an innocent child and a dog,  
Expose a traitor and countless manifestations of the evil in people's hearts.

It has kept her going through sleepless nights when time was of the essence  
And when it has felt as if she alone could do what had to be done,  
Been by her side so often it is one of the team,  
She has tried to quit for at times it's power has almost overwhelmed her  
But it is quite simply, her drug of choice.

It is the way he tells her how he feels about her,  
He finds the words too hard to speak,  
They share a friendship of understood silences.

Over the years so many tears, laughter and cases  
It was there through it all,  
But who could have guessed, have ever imagined,  
It would provide them with a way to bring their friend home.

* * *

A/N - I know strictly speaking this doesn't _feature_ Abby but as CafPow is her drink I thought it should go here.


	10. Through A Wall Of Glass

_"Do you know what a clog is?"  
__"A shoe or a blocked drain?"  
"On the internet."  
"I thought that was a blog but my English is often wrong."_  
Gibbs and Ziva in Twisted Sister.

An extract from Abby's blog.

THROUGH A WALL OF GLASS.

Hi There Friends In Cyberspace!,

Welcome once again to the wonderful world of Abbsoulte where anything can happen and often does! Unfortunately this has not been good week for me. My Boss was involved in a serious incident and ended up in a coma and that was only the beginning of the bad news. It was so awful watching him lying there so still and knowing there was nothing I could do to help him except think positive thoughts. He is a man of action not words, proudly claims that he has never even had a cold and likes to take care of himself so seeing him like that was like I'd entered an alternative reality.

If it had been me I know he would've been demanding answers and the best of treatment options available but I was able to leave that to his Boss (with whom I suspect he once had a thing). We were all so relieved when he woke up but at that point the nightmare got worse. He couldn't remember any of us! Not Mr Movies, the Boss or even the Doc with whom he's worked for far longer than any of us. That was scary enough I didn't think the Positive Vibes were going to work. Fortunately it came back but then he did the unthinkable; he quit!! With a few words he walked away from the job, from his team, from me. It is now a few days later and I think I understand why he did it especially in light of some info about his past the Doc just gave me. However, it is not the same without him and he won't stay away. I won't allow it.

Til next time, hugging you all in my mind, I am Abbsolute - Queen of the Lab.


	11. Better By Far

_This one is for Angy because there are only so many times an author can say "thank you."_

BETTER BY FAR.

Passing the doorway Ducky notices that Abby is sitting at her desk and frowning at her computer monitor but most unusually there is no music blaring and threatening to rupture the eardrums of anyone nearby.

"I was just heading out. What are you doing here so late Abby?"  
"I could ask you the same question" she responds gently trying to deflect his query.  
"Mr Palmer and I have finally finished that gruesome task we've been avoiding for days. It never gets any easier and is probably one of the hardest jobs for a medical examiner to undertake."  
"Requisition forms?"  
"Yes."  
"I'm going over my evidence in the Scarletti case."  
"The petty officer who murdered his C.O.?"

"Yeah. I'm in court tomorrow and no matter how many times I testify I still get really nervous. It's not the forensics that I worry about really it's all the attendant fuss. I know Jenny and Ziva are right and appearances matter almost as much as the evidence but I don't feel like _me_ in my court suit. Last time the guys called me career girl barbie."

Ducky tries not to smile at her obvious distress. Sometimes he found that Abby felt things a little too deeply than was maybe good for her.

"So you're going over your results?"  
"Yes. Well no. I've just finished and am wondering if there's anything I've forgot to check." She grins ruefully.  
"If I know you it was all right the first time but now you've checked it two or three times more..."  
"Four actually" she interrupts.  
"And the results won't change. You will be fine. How about I treat you a meal and make sure you get home early before the big day tomorrow?"  
"Thanks Duckman, that is a great idea. I'll just check the time I need to be there, shut this down and we can be on our way."  
Ducky turns to get her coat as she brings up her calendar.  
"Oh, my God!"  
Ducky turns back to find Abby staring up at him with tears in her eyes.  
"I can't believe this. How could....I....I don't believe..."  
"Slow down my dear. What is wrong?"  
She is too upset to speak so she just points at the calendar on the screen.  
"Ah."

"I almost forgot Ducky. The day is nearly over and I didn't think of her once.I even laughed at that joke Tony was telling Tim and it wasn't even that funny. It's only been five years. How could I have forgotten? And why didn't any of the others say something? I know Gibbs wouldn't or Ziva under the circumstances but how could Tim,Tony and you not mention the anniversary of Kate's death? Did you forget too?" She glares at him.

"No, Abigail I did not forget and did you not notice how gruff Gibbs has been today? More so than usual that is. Tony has not made a single movie reference either and Tim has been telling each of his colleagues something he likes about them. They remembered Abby.I'm guessing they just didn't want to remind you in case you were upset or maybe they thought you had and didn't want to mention it."

"Oh. But she was my friend Doc. I knew her almost the longest and we spent so much time together. How could I nearly forget the day she died. What sort of a friend does that make me?"  
"Human. This reminds me of a poem by Christina Rossetti I learnt in school. It went something like this

Remember me when I am gone away,  
Gone far away into the silent land;  
When you can no more hold me by the hand,  
Nor I half turn to go yet turning stay.  
Remember me when no more day by day  
You tell me of our future that you planned:  
Only remember me you understand  
It will be late to counsel then or pray.  
Yet if you should forget me for a while  
And afterwards remember, do not grieve:  
For if the darkness and corruption leave  
A vestige of the thoughts that once I had,  
Better by far you should forget and smile  
Than that you should remember and be sad."

"I'm not sure I understand."  
"Kate liked it when you laughed. She liked it when you were happy. I think that she would much prefer that you should smile and be happy in either remembering or forgetting her instead of being sad. She knew what a good friend you were Abby."  
She jumps up from her seat and hugs him. "Thanks Ducky. You're the greatest."  
"My pleasure my dear. Now about that bite to eat?"  
"Lead the way Doc."


	12. The Hug

THE HUG_._

_  
_All these months later she still is not used to his absence. No teasing, no kisses, no Caf-Pows, no sudden appearances behind her when she discovered something. It simply wasn't natural. Not the way things should and she'd thought always would be in the land of Abby. Of course after she'd calmed down and Ducky had filled her in on a few things about Gibbs' past she had come to realise that leaving really had been the only thing he could do. She knew where he was after tracking his airline booking and using a few not entirely legal techniques to confirm her guess that he had gone to Mexico to stay with Franks. The team had rallied round and were healing. They were slowly learning to deal with the fact they were now Team Tony but sometimes she wished with her whole heart that he had not gone.

Today was one of those days. She'd gone to court but it had been continued so she'd struggled through the pouring rain to work. Then Tim had brought in a cell phone that had been recovered from a crime scene but it had been badly damaged and she was having trouble retrieving any data from it. None of her other tests on the fingerprints or the blood had been successful so far either. Tony had been doing his best Gibbs impression demanding results in a totally unreasonable time frame and McGee was not helping at all as he kept suggesting things she'd thought of hours ago. It was moments like this she missed him badly. No matter how hopeless things appeared he always had faith she'd find something. She picks up Bert and gives him a big hug but this only manges to elicit a small smile. "Come on Abby" she murmurs. There must be some way to get that data. Then she has an idea and closes her eyes.

It was something Gibbs had suggested to her years ago. He had been leaving on an assignment and she'd been upset about breaking up with a boyfriend or some such silly little thing. He'd not wanted to leave her like that so he'd told her that while he was away she had to close her eyes at least once every day and imagine him giving her a hug. Then he'd joked that she'd have to keep count so he could validate them when he got back. So she pictures him in her mind. She feels the comfort, the care and the strength she gains from having his arms around her. Suddenly her eyes fly open. "Yes!" She pumps her fist in the air. She now knows how to get the information. With the help of a Gibbs' hug anything was possible.


	13. Her Knights In Shining Whatever

HER KNIGHTS IN SHINING WHATEVER.

Abby's Apartment.

As she takes out last years team photo and fits the new one into a frame Abby starts to think about her male colleagues. First in her thoughts, as always is Gibbs. The Boss. Bourbon, boat and redhead loving, gruff with most people except for her, head-slapper par excellence, Caf-Pow! supplier, cheek kisser and giver of the most comforting hugs. He would do anything he could to protect her and the team.

Ducky. Despite the endless stories that the others find boring and she finds fascinating the team would not be complete without the elderly medical examiner. They would often bounce ideas off each other and something one of them had said would inspire the other to find a solution to a problem. He is also the only one she allows to call her Abigail as he had once told her that it and not a nickname was a suitable appellation for a professional lady and she quite likes the idea of being thought a lady.

Tim. They've managed to stay friends after the thing they had when he had temporary duty in Washington. It was good to have someone to talk tech with and not have to bring it down to the most basic level as she does with Gibbs and Tony. Although at times he could be a bit naive or sort of sweetly innocent he has grown a lot over his time with them though in some ways he still has a long way to go!

Tony. She smiles to herself. He might appear on the surface to be a shallow skirt chaser (although the business with the undercover assignment had changed that somewhat) and desperate for the Boss's approval but she knows there is much more to the Senior Field Agent than meets the eye. After years as a cop and investigator he has street smarts and is very, very loyal to his friends.

Palmer. He might look a bit young and inexperienced but he studied hard and even the timing of his jokes was starting to improve! He is hardworking and loyal and following Ducky's example would make a fine ME one day.

Yes, she thinks finally fitting the photo to her satisfaction and adding it to the collection of family photos on her bookcase. They really are her knights in shining armor who would do anything for her just as she would do anything for them.

* * *

I have to admit to "borrowing" the title of this fic from something in a Grey's Antamony epsiode.


	14. I Never Cry,Never Ever

I NEVER CRY, NEVER EVER.

Abby's Lab. Abby is seated at her desk staring at a piece of paper that is resting on her keyboard.

"Hey Abby. This is the last of the stuff we bagged at the crime scene. Where do you want it?" DiNozzo is so focused on not dropping the boxes he's carrying that it takes him a moment to realise there's no music playing.

"Oh, just leave it over there " she replies unenthusiastically.

"Is something wrong Abby?" Tony enquires with concern. For Abby not to be thrilled at having new evidence to analyse he knows something must be really wrong. She looks up at him and he is stunned to see the mascara tracks caused by tears on her cheeks.

"No! Why would anything be wrong DiNozzo?" She glares at him but even as she does so another tear trickles down her face. Emotional scenes are not something Tony DiNozzo feels at all comfortable with. He would almost rather take on an angry suspect, an irritated Ziva or an annoyed Gibbs than deal with a crying woman but this is Abby, Abby his friend who never cries and he would have to do something to help even if he has no idea what that could be.

"Well. There's no music playing and as a senior field agent my brilliant investigative skills tell me you've been crying." She gives a weak grin. "Is it something Gibbs did?"

"No."

"Ziva?"

"No."

"Probie? I'll head slap him for you if you like."

"No, it wasn't Tim. I was cleaning out my desk today and I found this." She hands him the piece of paper. It is a cartoon of Abby as a bat and he remembers at once the time he first saw it. The time when right here in the lab they discovered Kate's hobby of sketching and saw those she'd done of him and Abby.

"Oh, Tony I know it's only been six months but it still hurts like it was yesterday. I miss her so much." She jumps to her feet and hugs him.

"Me too Abs. Me too." They pull apart. "I could get it framed for you if you'd like? Maybe Gibbs could do it."

"Thanks Tony. That's a great idea. Now show me what evidence goodies you've got for me."

Smiling now she begins to examine the evidence as Tony makes a mental note to ask Gibbs about the framing the very next time he sees him.


	15. An Undefinable Something

AN UNDEFINABLE SOMETHING.

Friendship. So hard to define and impossible to quantify. It might be built on a shared past. Growing up in the same street and going to the same school. Working in the same section and despising the same supervisor. Celebrating success and commiserating over failure as part of a sporting team. United in a shared passion of books, motorcycles, movies, art, fanfiction, sport.

Or it might come from actions. A simple act of kindness. Looking into another's eyes and understanding the very heart of them and seeing in those eyes an acceptance of the very heart of you despite the age difference, the life difference even a gender difference! Feeling safe in another's arms knowing that whatever happens the two of you will deal with it together. A friendship such as this is tighter than blood. It can make you laugh in the midst of tears and should be unbreakable by the mere events of life. That is the friendship Gibbs and I have. So how can he walk away? Not just from the team but from me?


	16. Piece Of My Heart

PIECE OF MY HEART.

_It hurt to hear the words you had to say  
And now you are so very, very far away  
So many words I simply could not say  
Forced to stand and watch  
You left with a piece of my heart that day_

_I know some day we'll meet again  
And know that tighter than blood we'll always be friends  
You were doing what you had to do  
I had no choice but to let you_

_Time has passed  
The pain no less  
Understanding dawning  
I know that some day you will return  
And hope it will be because you've found  
The peace you need._


	17. Broken Wings And Comforting Arms

BROKEN WINGS AND COMFORTING ARMS.

Twice you've promised me  
I'll keep you safe, no-one will hurt you  
Stood with me in my pain and my fear  
Let me talk until the way ahead was clear

So many times you've held me  
Made me feel so safe and loved  
Made me laugh and dried my tears  
Known just what to say or sometimes when not to say anything at all

And if I ever tried to thank you  
I know exactly what you'd say  
You'd shrug and dismiss it  
As just what friends do every day

So I shut my eyes and send positive vibes your way  
And hope and pray for your health and happiness  
And that we'll be together again one day.


	18. Tomorrow

_Dedication - This one is for J. my silver haired fox who provides me with some of 'Gibbs' best lines. We might not be fighting but I owe you an apology and I'm missing your arms so very, very much._

* * *

TOMORROW.

"It could have been us every single day of the week. Sometimes it has been.  
If you want to worry about something worry about tomorrow."  
Jethro Gibbs. Grace Period.

Niggling fears. We all have them. The things that wake us in the middle of the night in tangled sheets with a racing heart or swirl in our head so we can't sleep. The thoughts that sneak up on us at odd moments catching us unexpectedly and causing us to pause a moment in our hectic lives. Considering all that she has been through in her life with hitmen and crazy boyfriends and all the stuff she witnesses daily in her job it is perhaps surprising that Abby Scuito is not haunted by them more often but she is a positive person and when woken by her fears they are not for her but for those she loves.

Gibbs. She'd had a small taste of what it would be like to not have his presence daily in her life when he left and was determined it would never happen again. Of course, rationally she knows there is nothing she could do to prevent this so she resolutely pushes this fear away not wanting to give it room in her head. He had survived the loss of his family, god only knew what when he was in the marines, Ari and two comas surely he deserved no more violent death.

Ducky. He chided at her fussing but there was no denying he was getting older and even if his mind was still as sharp as ever her eyes had detected some small signs of physical weakness. So any small thing she could to help she did always careful not to hurt his pride at no longer being as able as he once was.

Ziva. The crazy ninja chick as DiNozzo was fond of calling her was certainly the most capable of looking after herself in any situation of physical danger but emotionally it was a whole other story. Although she was still reluctant to open up to Abby, and given her past who could blame her, they were slowly coming to trust each other. Abby had even noticed the flicker of a smile the last time she'd hugged Ziva.

McGee. Apart from Gibbs her Timmy was the one she worried about most. He might be tech smart but for an agent he was still rather trusting and naive. He really needed to work in developing his gut.

DiNozzo. Sometimes she felt the senior field agents biggest problem was the potential for damage caused by the Gibbs slaps but in her heart she knows Tony's problems run far deeper. Daddy issues, commitment issues, women issues...you name an issue DiNozzo had it. But there was an underlying strength to Tony, she suspected learnt through whatever he'd had to live with as a child, and she was confident he'd continue to grow as an agent and a man.

Her eyes fly open in the dark and she glances at the skull clock on her bedside table. It is just on midnight so she picks up her phone and hits speed dial.

"Gibbs!"

"Hey Boss you working on your boat?"

"Yeah. What's up Abs?"

"I was wondering...that is...could you..."

"Something wrong Abs?"

"Just silly fears. I can't sleep. I was wondering if we could just talk awhile or...."

They've been through this a couple of times. Every few years or so when she can't cope with being alone with her thoughts.

"Would you like me to come over?"

"Don't be silly. I'm fine."

"Abs!"

"O.K. I mean thanks. With you in the guest room I'm sure I'll feel safe enough to sleep. Do you still have your key from feeding my plants?'

"Yes. I'll be with you in about twenty minutes."

"I'll make up the bed and Gibbs..."

"Yeah?"

"Thanks."

"You're welcome."

And with him asleep in the next room all her fears fade away until the next time.


	19. Girl Power

GIRL POWER.

NCIS Interrogation Room.

"You know we do not believe that this plan was your idea. If you tell us who else was involved we would appreciate it. Do you understand?"

The man sitting across from Ziva does not respond but just glares. The silence is broken by a knock on the door. "Enter."

Abby enters the room. "I'm here to take a cheek swab." The guy continues to stare but she's been stared at by Gibbs, the master of the stare and is not in the least intimidated. "It doesn't hurt. Open wide."

He does but as she leans in he suddenly jumps from his seat and pins her back against the wall. As Ziva stands and pushes the table aside Abby knees him between the legs and before he can recover shoves him backwards. As she grapples with him Ziva grabs him and in seconds they have him on the floor with them kneeling on his back. Abby stands and leans back against the wall. The door bursts open and Tony rushes in his eyes widening as he takes in the scene.

"What is going on in here?"

"Got a spare pair of cuffs Tony?"

"Ah."

"Here use mine." Abby takes them from her trouser pocket and tosses them to Ziva. She cuffs the guy and hauls him to his feet.

"You O.K. Abby?"

"Yeah. Nice work Officer David."

"I asked what is going on in here? I could hear you halfway down the hall." DiNozzo glares at Ziva.

"When Abby went to swab him he lunged at her...."

"And you took him down? Nice work Officer David."

"No, Tony I did not take him down. It was Abby with a strategically placed knee." She grins.

"Way to go Abs. Where did you learn moves like that?"

"Hang around the right sort of bars and you pick up all kinds of things." She grins. "Plus Kate and Gibbs taught me some stuff. I'm going for a Caf-Pow!"

She leaves with her bemused colleagues staring after her.


	20. Taking Care Of Gibbs

TAKING CARE OF GIBBS.

"Hey Bossman."

He looks up from the boat he's been sanding as she bounces down the stairs her arms filled by a bag of takeout and a couple of bottles of beer.

"Hi Abs." He watches as she unloads the boxes onto his workbench. This wasn't a surprise as she'd called to tell him she was coming but after the week the team had just had he really wished she hadn't. Of course he'd tried to dissuade her but in typical Abby fashion she hadn't listened. He needed some time alone. Time with only his boat and his bourbon. Not to grieve as such but to deal with the events of the week and the memories that have been stirred up. Pacci was dead and even though he had been through it too many times before each one still hurt. It hurt in a different way depending on the person and the circumstances and compounded by all the losses of the past. With Pacci's death as with that of any agent there was always the question of if it could've been prevented and the reminder that they are vulnerable.

"What do you want first?"

"I'm not hungry Abby" he growls hoping she'll get the hint and just leave.

"Maybe later then. What about a beer?"

"Abs!"

"Come on Gibbs. I hate to drink alone." She grins at him and reluctantly he takes a beer from her. She opens hers and perches on a stool to watch as he goes back to working on the boat.

"It was a nice service, I thought." He doesn't reply and she wonders where he has gone in his head. The horrors he must have seen as a marine and the funerals of friends he must have attended.

"Gibbs?" He's thinking of his wife and daughter. That cold, grey day he had to walk away and leave them behind. "Gibbs" her voice is more insistent now breaking in on his thoughts.

"Remember that time Pacci and Tony were on that stakeout and...."

As they share memories and sip their beer the pain begins to ease a little. Almost without noticing Gibbs picks up some takeout and begins to eat. Several hours later as she shuts his front door behind her Abby murmurs in her best Gibbs voice "Good job Abs."


	21. Happy Birthday Abby

HAPPY BIRTHDAY ABBY.

"So where are we going Bossman?" she asks fastening her seat belt as he pulls away from the kerb.

"You'll see."

"Have I been there before? Have we been together? Have I been with someone else? How far is it?"

"Abs!"

"Sorry but won't you give me a teensy-incy clue?"

"No."

Knowing this means he'll divulge no further information she subsides into silence puzzling over where they might be headed. They had gone out the night before as was traditional before her birthday but instead of a present he'd told her he was going to take her out tonight as well. All he had said about their plans was that she should wear a nice dress and what time he would pick her up. Soon she begins to recognize landmarks and realises where they must be headed.

"Gibbs!"

"Yes Abs?" he responds with a small smile.

"_Why _are we going to Ducky's?"

"We've planned a birthday dinner for you."

"We?"

"Ducky has provided the venue and offered his guest rooms if anyone needs to stay and not drive."

"Like Tony?" He grins but doesn't reply.

"Ziva has been cooking all afternoon with Palmer helping. Tony has selected some suitable movies for the evenings entertainment. McGee has been working for weeks on a birthday ode, a speech and some sort of multi-media thingy of your life during the past year."

"Oh and apart from transportation what will be your contribution to this feast?" she enquires as they pull into Ducky's driveway. He parks and comes around to her open her door helping her out and answering her question at the same time.

"I'm in charge of drinks." He offers her his arm and she takes it.

"You? Will we be drinking bourbon all night?"

"Maybe but I've also supplied the ingredients to make a Hairy Hangover or two."

Laughing they mount the steps to the house. This really was going to be some birthday feast.


	22. TLC NCIS Style

*Reposted. Minor spoilers for the season 6 episode Toxic.*

TLC NCIS STYLE.

Abby's Apartment.

It had been one of the hardest days she'd experienced since coming to NCIS and although she'd known there was no logical reason for it she had been a little scared. Yes, this day was definitely going in her worst day ever top ten along with Kate's death, Gibbs' coma, Ducky being kidnapped and Tony being infected. She was too wound up to sleep so as the rain lashed her windows she was curled up on her couch reading back issues of the Journal of Forensic Sciences trying to calm her racing brain and pounding heartbeat. A knock on the door startles her and she checks the peephole before opening the door to Ducky.

"I saw your lights were on and thought you might like company."

"That's sweet Duckman but I'm fine. Really....I'm...."

"I brought icecream." He brings the tubs from behind his back.

"Icecream sundaes!" She smiles. "Well you'd better come in then."

As they work on preparing the sundaes their companionable silence is broken by the ring of the doorbell. Checking she sees Tony pulling face and opens the door.

"Hey Abs. Saw your lights on and thought you might want company."

"Come in. Ducky and I are making sundaes. Want one?"

"Sure. Hi Ducky" he calls out.

"I brought every virus infecting,mutating movie I could find and then when we're ready to be really scared I brought....."

"Oh no, you didn't! I'm not sure I can handle it tonight." She grins.

"What's that Tony?" Ducky asks bringing in the sundaes.

"Sleepless In Seattle" Tony and Abby respond simultaneously.

As they sit down to eat there's a knock on the door. Through the peephole she observes McGee looking hesitant and shuffling his feet. She opens the door.

"Sorry to stop by so late but I saw your lights on and thought you might want company. I brought Bert. You left him in the lab."

"And I brought beer and popcorn" adds Jimmy appearing next to him and startling them both.

"Palmer?"

"Tony paged me and told me to get over here stat with the supplies."

"Well don't just stand there guys come in. This is turning into quite a party."

A short time later as they are all happily munching, sipping and arguing over which movie to put on first the doorbell rings. Abby checks and then opens the door to Ziva.

"I saw that your lights were on and thought you might like company. Looks like I wasn't the only one." Ziva smiles as Abby motions her inside.

"What did you bring?"

"Bring?" Ziva queries looking confused.

"Oh, sorry." Abby replies embarrassed. "All the others brought something but I didn't mean you should have....that is...come and have some popcorn."

"Thanks Abby."

Coming out of the kitchen with the latest batch of popcorn Abby smiles as she looks around at her friends. Tony is expounding on the best virus movies ever and Tim is listening with barely concealed impatience, Ducky and Ziva are discussing a past case and Jimmy is tidying up some of the mess and grins at her as he passes by bringing the empty plates to the kitchen.

It had been a day that was without doubt in her top ten worst ever days but with her friends around her she was starting to feel much better although she was curious about the absence of one team member. As if caused by her thoughts there's a knock on the door and this time she has no need to check to know who it is.

"Gibbs."

"Saw your lights on and thought you might want company."

Raucous laughter rings out from behind Abby.

"Seems I was wrong." He turns to leave.

"Don't be silly Bossman. It wouldn't be the same without you. Come in."

As he does feeling absurdly pleased by her comment she smiles contentedly to have her family around her. The whole experience had shaken her and she certainly didn't want to repeat it any time soon. After all it wasn't a common occurrence for a Scuito to have a dentist appointment!


	23. Random Reactions

*Tag to NCIS:LA episode Random On Purpose.*

RANDOM REACTIONS.

LA Eric: Did you get home O.K.?  
Abbsolute: Yeah. Thanks. Flight good. Welcome home not so.  
LA Eric: Why?  
Abbsolute: Gibbs picked me up at the airport not McGee!!  
LA Eric: Ouch.  
Abbsolute: He hardly spoke on the drive but the others called. McGee was cross I didn't check the identities of those on the forum more closely & Ziva & Tony were cross I went out the back of the bar on my own. I tried to point out I was only on a date not an undercover mission but it didn't seem to help.  
La Eric: I think it's just because they were worried about you....  
Abbsolute: That makes sense. Guess I'm still a bit shaken up.  
LA Eric: What did Gibbs say?  
Abbsolute: Well he actually apologized for not taking me more seriously when I brought this to him (and for him that is a big deal) and then he made me promise to be more careful in the future.  
LA Eric: That doesn't sound too bad.  
Abbsolute: It was just the _way_ he said it. He's lost too many people to take this lightly.  
LA Eric: Where are you now? I hope you're not alone.  
Abbsolute: Gibbs insisted I stay at Ducky's although the docs at your end gave me the all clear.  
LA Eric: Sorry our date was so eventful. Maybe I can make it up to you next time you're here or I'm there....?  
Abbsolute: Maybe. In fact, hopefully!! Goodnight Eric.  
LA Eric: Goodnight Abby.

* * *

A/N - Yeah, bits of that episode_ really_ annoyed me. My computer, my muse and parts of my mind have been "out to lunch" in recent months but things have settled down and I'm hoping to soon be posting some better quality fics. than my last few. I'd like to thank everyone for the reviews and pms. You know feedback is always much appreciated. Gail.


	24. Not So Silently Screaming

NOT SO SILENTLY SCREAMING.

As he enters the lab carrying a box carefully concealed behind his back Tim is puzzled to see the back of Abby jumping up and down in the Ballistics Lab. Quickly he stashes the box in a drawer and as he straightens up she turns around and sees him. She bounces out of the lab in her usual exuberant manner.

"What's happening?" they ask simultaneously.  
"Ladies first."  
"Aww. You're so sweet Timmy."  
"What on earth were you doing Abby?"  
"Releasing tension."  
"Huh?"  
"Whenever I have a really bad day I just get in the Ballistics Lab and scream and jump and let it all out. It's wonderful and as the room is soundproofed it doesn't bother anyone. You really should try it some time." She grins.  
"That's why I write. Why are you having such a bad day?"  
"Well. I'm having trouble with the lock of the door on my apartment, my hearse wouldn't start again, those jerks in admin. were teasing me at lunch, my computer is being really slow and the Director wants those requisition forms before the end of the day. And of course someone..." she glares at him."Ate the cupcake I was saving as a reward for finishing them."  
"I said I'm sorry about that Abs." She continues to glare. "I know how I can fix it."  
"You do?"  
"Yeah, sure. I'll ask Gibbs to look at your lock, Tony to look at your hearse and Ziva to talk those guys in admin." Abby begins to smile. "If you call Jimmy I'm sure he'll come and help with the forms. The Doc said they finished the ones for Autopsy really quickly as Palmer has a new system. While you're waiting for him I'll take a look at your computer. You'll be finished and out of here in no time."  
"And what about the cupcake?" she queries trying and failing to look stern.  
"Close your eyes." She does and he takes out the box.  
"Open them." She does to find him there holding out a box with four cupcakes in it.  
"Timmy!" she squeals in delight. She takes it from him, places it on her desk and throws her arms around him.  
"I got all your favorites. Now let's get to work." He sits down and starts to tap at the keyboard.  
Smiling now she takes out her phone to call Jimmy. Maybe it wasn't such a bad day after all.

* * *

A/N - To anyone having a "bad" day it can only get better and tomorrow's a new day.... right? I'm starting to feel the need for a cupcake....


	25. Absence

ABSENCE.

I'm sending these thoughts your way  
From my heart to yours  
Missing you more today than yesterday  
You called with nothing much to say  
I know you were checking that I'm O.K.  
But how can I be with you gone?

You need some time, some distance  
You've seen too much  
Need to be away  
Even from us

So I'll hold you in my heart  
As I know I'm in yours  
And pray  
That this absence _will_ end some day.


	26. Needing And Wishing

NEEDING & WISHING.

_I want you here beside me  
Because I can wipe these tears  
But you, only you can calm my silly fears  
Need your reassurance  
Need your words of love  
Need your understanding  
Need for us to hug  
Need to know it's not forever  
Need you now_

_Wish that you could talk to me  
Share what you've been through  
Wish I could make you smile  
__Wish I could put my arms around you__  
Wish that I could take away the pain you feel every day  
If only for awhile  
Wish that you didn't have to go  
Oh, if only wishing could make it so_

_Need to hear your voice  
Need to let you know I care  
However, you made your wishes very clear  
I need to let you go  
Though I wish with my whole heart  
That your needs did not mean we have to part._


	27. What Would The Day Be Without It

WHAT WOULD THE DAY BE WITHOUT IT.

Abby's Lab. Late Evening.

Abby is going about her usual tasks of running fingerprints and analyzing the items found at the scene but despite the abundance of evidence she is not a happy Goth. She turns up her stereo and slams the next box of items onto the table. It had been a busy few weeks for the team with a number of cases and bodies turning up in the middle of the night and witnesses going missing and needing to be found asap. She had basically been living in her lab and she knew she was starting to become stressed when she'd snapped at poor Timmy earlier in the day. For her colleagues to be annoying her was most unusual.

Despite the horrors she's seen during the course of her years at NCIS and the things she's personally experienced like her stalker boyfriend, the hit man who came after her so she couldn't testify, Kate's death, her kidnapping she truly believes she is a positive person but even a happy Goth can have a blue day. Lost in her thoughts she doesn't even notice him enter the room.

"Abby?....Abs?"  
"Gibbs! What are you doing here? I didn't call. I don't have anything for you. I told you it would be a few hours. I did not send out any calling Gibbs vibes."  
"Abs!"  
"You shouldn't be here. I can't work under this pressure. I've been mainlining CafPow! I said I'd call...."  
"Abs! You've been acting hinky all day. What's wrong?"  
"Just a blue day. No big deal."  
"What can I do to help?"  
"Nothing. I'm O.K." He just stands there staring at her.  
"Well, there is one thing."  
"Headslap DiNozzo?"  
She chuckles. "No. I need a hug."  
"You only had to ask" he responds as he puts his arms around her. She holds on tight for a moment drawing strength from their connection, their friendship then steps back. "Thanks Gibbs. You know it's pretty amazing."  
"What is?"  
"You knew I needed you before I knew and came down to let me know..." she's interrupted by a noise from one of her machines. "Oh goody. Let's see what Major Mass Spec has found."  
As she turns from him to the machine Gibbs can't help but smile. Abby Sciuto was definitely one of a kind.


	28. Voices

VOICES.

We speak for the dead  
Those with voices silenced before their time  
We tell their stories  
Discover their secrets, their dreams, their hopes and fears and shame  
We cannot give back what has been taken  
That precious gift of life  
All we can find are answers  
To the questions of those left behind

Through our skills we discover  
How they died  
And sometimes how they lived  
To us the task of preventing  
The evil that has taken them continuing

It may seem a noble task  
This searching for truth  
It is not  
It is simply and only  
All that we can do  
We speak for the dead.


	29. First Conversation

A/N - This is a slightly rewritten repost because I'm trying to trim my stories list to make it easier for people to find the serial they're following and because no-one seems to read the "back catalogue". This is one of _my_ favourites and I wanted to keep it so I added it to this collection.

* * *

FIRST CONVERSATION.

It is a few weeks after she has started at NCIS and Abby is sitting at her desk glaring at her computer screen with the music blaring. She's wondering if she's made a big mistake and has been since the Director yelled at her that morning. Not a mistake with evidence. So far everything she had been given had been fairly straightforward apart from the blood splatter and even that she'd dealt with. What Abby is wondering as she sits there is if she'd made a mistake in coming to NCIS. She'd stood there as the Director shouted at her like she was a schoolgirl caught smoking behind the bike sheds not the fully qualified forensic scientist she is. Then she'd nodded meekly, said "Yes Sir" and left. This was not her usual style at all but she hadn't known what else to do. Suddenly the lab falls silent.

"Don't ever" Abby turns around scowling and jumps out of her chair when she realizes who is in her lab. "Special Agent Gibbs. What can I do for you?" She had heard agents talking about the legendary Agent Gibbs of course and was curious as to how much truth there ws behind the stories. She did know whatever story was told it was always with a deep measure of respect. Although they'd talked on the phone and bumped into each other at the vending machine a couple of times this was the first time he had come down to her lab. Oh hell what now she thinks. Abby is surprized when he holds out a Caf-Pow!to her. He always seemed so preoccupied she couldn't quite believe he'd noticed and remembered her drink preference.

"Miss Sciuto. Just wanted to say good job on that blood splatter evidence and..."  
"and...?" cheering up slightly as she accepts the drink and the compliment Abby is puzzled by the hesitant expression on Agent Gibbs face.  
"I heard the Director yelled at you for not getting the results fast enough."  
Abby glares at him for a moment then she explodes with "You can't rush science Special Agent Gibbs. In an analysis of this sort first you have to..."  
"Miss Sciuto I understand but..."  
"You do?" she interrupts sceptically.  
"No, I don't but it always has taken that long. I wanted to tell you the Director didn't mean it."  
"He sure sounded like he did." She continues to glare at him.  
"You haven't been here long enough to know. The Director gets like this sometimes when we're on a tough case. It isn't personal."

"Oh." She knew the agents had been spending long hours on the case but were failing to come up with answers. That was why she had stayed late waiting on the DNA results. Of course Special Agent Gibbs was working on the case too. Yet he had taken the time to come and check on her and explain why the Director had acted as he had. Interesting she thinks. Gibbs appeared to have a softer side well hidden behind that gruff exterior. Abby was starting to feel much happier.

"Goodnight Miss Sciuto" Gibbs turns to leave.  
"Abby."  
"What?" he turns back.  
"My friends call me Abby."  
"Friend..." as if he's searching his memory for the meaning of the word. "We've only just met" he states with an inquisitively raised eyebrow.  
"Friend - someone who is always welcome in my lab no matter what my mood especially if he's bringing me a Caf-Pow!"  
Gibbs lips twitch in what might be a smile. Looking stern he replies "We'll see. Goodnight" he pauses "Abby." His phone rings. "Gibbs." He listens. "On my way." He hangs up. "There's been a breakthrough in the case."  
"A breakthrough, a breakthrough, there's been a breakthrough." Abby jumps up and down and hugs the very startled special shocked but smiling all the same he responds "And it's all because of your blood splatter analysis." He kisses the cheek of the even more startled forensic scientist."Got to go."  
"Goodnight Agent Gibbs."

He turns the stereo on as he leaves. With just a brief conversation she'd been able to take his mind off the horrors of the current case and she didn't appear to have taken the Director's reprimand to heart. He'd keep an eye on her after all she was now one of the team but he already knew Abby was going to fit in just fine.


	30. Moving Forward,Looking Back

MOVING FORWARD,LOOKING BACK.

Why is it things have to change?  
Nothing ever stays the same  
Not people, not places, not feelings  
Death, betrayal, friendship, love, lies  
All change in the merest blink of an eye

It is useless to try and hold on  
To scream and cling with a desperate grip so strong  
For whatever steps we take  
To plan, to control, to arrange our own fate  
Are simply nothing  
To the forward passage of time  
So we can only remember and dream  
Letting the Gods do with us whatever they will.


	31. Just What To Say

*Kind of a tag to the episode Murder 2.0 and inspired by the ep. Skeletons.*

JUST WHAT TO SAY.

Abby's Lab.

"Why are you working through lunch Abs? I know you don't have any evidence to be processing since we don't have a case." Gibbs enquires as he walks into her office where she is seated and frowning at her computer.  
"Correct as always Bossman but I do have paperwork to get caught up on. The Director is planning an audit soon so his secretary told me and I need to update a few files."  
"Oh." He turns to leave.  
"Gibbs?" He turns back to find her looking up at him with a gaze that is part puzzled and part upset.  
"Yeah?"  
She continues to stare a moment then jumps from her seat and begins pacing the room. "What is wrong with me Gibbs? I mean what can it be? I seem to attract...I mean I'm kind of like a magnet for...weirdos!" She stops and turns to look at him then continues on when he doesn't comment. "There was Mikel, then that guy from the case, Ari though that was really about you and Chip and now Jani-cam? Why is it they all come out to play around me? Do they think just cos I'm female I'm somehow an easy target?" She snorts. "Well how wrong is that. I can take care of myself. I've proven it time and time again and if they think this kind of thing is going to stop me doing the work I love then they don't know Ms Abigail Sciuto at all!" She grins as she crosses the room. "Thanks Boss. You always know what to say." She throws her arms around him in a bone-crushing hug and despite all she's just said from within that circle of comfort and strength she wishes for just a moment that she never had to let go.


	32. Loss

_Special Dedication - This is going out to all those who are currently missing a loved one.  
Separated through war, peace-keeping, death, illness, family dysfunction, work or just distance.  
We may not be able to hold them in our arms but we will always hold them in our hearts._

LOSS.

Abby's Lab.  
"Oh, my God! Oh, my God!"  
"What is it Abby?" McGee asks rushing into the office where she is seated at her computer.  
"I just got an IM from Cassie" she replies looking up at him as tears start to form in her eyes.  
"Your best friend from your home town?" She nods. "So what's wrong?"  
"She's just found out David...that's her brother...we dated for awhile...he was quite sweet for a jock...he was...was killed by an IED in Iraq. He was on a patrol and got blown up. Oh, Timmy he was doing his job and he died for it." She rises from her chair and throws her arms around him  
"It's O.K. Abby. It's O.K." He holds her for a minute. "Can I ask you something?"  
She sits back down and dabs at her eyes with a black lace handkerchief. "Sure."  
"Why was David in Iraq?"  
"He is... I guess I mean was...a Marine. It was his second tour."  
"And did he like being a Marine?"  
"Yeah. His Dad was too and it was all he talked about when we were growing up."  
"There you go then."  
"What are going to tell me he died doing what he loved and that makes it all O.K.?"  
"No, Abby of course not. I'm sure all his family and friends would prefer he hadn't gone and didn't die but that is not what happened. He died doing a job he believed was important and I think that has to count for something."  
She stares at him a moment. "Hmm. You may be right Timmy. You may be right." She turns back to her computer and begins to type.


	33. Goodbye

For Jim because it might not be conventional but it is _something_ and I know we will always keep it.

GOODBYE.

Gibbs walks into Abby's lab carrying the obligatory Caf-Pow!. "What you got for me Abs?" He suddenly realises there is no music playing and more worryingly no Abby. He places the the Caf-Pow! on her desk and heads up to the Director's office. "Is the Director in?"  
"I'll just tell her you're..." There is no point in Cynthia finishing the sentence as Gibbs is already past her.  
"Where's Abby?"  
"And good morning to you too Jethro."  
"Good morning Jen. Where's Abby?"  
"I gave her the day off for personal reasons."  
"Did she say why?"  
"No. Is there a problem?"  
"I'm not sure." Gibbs walks from the office and into the elevator. As he steps out of the elevator he meets Ducky.  
"Ah, there you are Jethro. I was just coming to tell you what I found on the lieutenant's body. Yes, it reminds of this case I had one time in..."  
"Duck I don't have time for this now. Abby has taken the day off and she didn't tell me about it which is very unusual."  
"We'll catch up later. Do you think something is wrong with Abigail?"  
"I don't know."  
"Well what's that famous gut of yours telling you?"  
"That I should find out." He walks away from Ducky into the squad room. Tony hangs up the phone as he does. "DiNozzo do you know where Abby is?"  
"No, Boss. Why?"  
"She's taken the day off and didn't tell me she was going to."  
"Our Goth goddess take the day off; that is unusual."  
"You think DiNozzo!" McGee walks in. "Did Abby tell you what she had on today?"  
"Something about a funeral I think."  
"Did she say whose?"  
"No." Gibbs stares at McGee. "But I'm going to find out." He starts tapping frantically on his keyboard.

A Cemetery.

Gibbs is standing beneath a tree watching a woman in the distance. She is carrying a black lace parasol and a white rose and is staring at a headstone. As he walks toward her she leans in to place the rose on the grave and he sees the name on the headstone is Michael Mauer. His voice is so gentle it is a mere whisper on the wind.  
"Abby."  
"Gibbs! You startled me. I heard Michael killed himself and I wanted to say goodbye. For all the terrible things he did we did have some fun times and he did help find who was threatening me."  
"Why didn't you tell me Abs?"  
"After what he put me through I didn't think you'd want to know even though I did think it would be easier with you here."  
"Abby we are friends. This is what friends do." He kisses her on the cheek and arm in arm they leave.


	34. Breath

*The 'funny' isn't working so here's some fluff instead.*

BREATH.

Your arms keep the grey away  
Make sunshine on the cloudiest day  
Fight the demons this job conjures  
Wipe awful images from my head  
Ease the pain of my heart  
Help me to breathe when all is lost

But who will do that now?  
You've walked away  
Gone too far  
Made sure we would not, could not follow

These tears will be seen by me alone  
For this pain is too much  
I will hold it in my heart  
Though I know they feel it

In time perhaps I'll understand  
But till then I'll have you in my heart  
If not in my life.


	35. A New Normal

Dedication - This one is for any Australian trying to adapt to a 'new normal' caused by the floods  
(Queensland,Victoria & Tasmania), Cyclone Yasi or the Western Australia bush fires.  
Also those affected by the snowstorms in the US. Our thoughts are with you at this difficult time.

A NEW NORMAL.

Abby's Lab.

"This is unacceptable. I can't work like this. Well, I can but I don't want to. I _really_ don't want to Bossman." As she glares at him Gibbs looks around the room ticking off items on a mental checklist. Incomprehensible music being played at ear shattering volume. Check. Several cartons of evidence on the table. Check. Major Mass Spec. and her other babies all in place. Check. As far as he can see Abby has all she needs to begin work.  
"What's missing Abby?"  
"What's missing?"  
She sighs and her glare softens as she glances around her lab. "Nothing, I guess. This is how things are going to be from now on. I'll just have to get used it to it. My new normal. I really don't want to but that's just life. Things change. Now get out of here so I can get to work." She begins to take items out of the boxes but as she is showing none of her usual excitement he knows something is definitely wrong.  
"Abs?" She continues what she's doing.  
"Abs? Talk to me." She stops and turns to him.  
"It's not a what it's a who that's missing and you can't change that, even you can't fix..."  
"Kate."  
"Yes. I miss her so much. I don't want to get used to how things are now. It will be like she was never here."  
"It's O.K. Abby." He pauses searching for the words. "A new normal does not mean the old one is forgotten. It just is how things are at this moment."  
"Thanks Gibbs. You always know just what to say." She throws her arms around him in a bone-crushing hug and he holds on tightly trying to put into it all the things he can't put into words. Abby was not the only one trying to adjust to a new normal.


	36. Slivers

SLIVERS.

The day Kate died a small sliver lodged itself in my heart. A sliver of pain, of loss. Of cherished memories and sadness at unfulfilled dreams. A silent echoing of lost laughter. A part of me that will always ache at the absence. It may change and lessen over time but it will stay with me.

It joined the sliver from when Tony was infected and that was soon joined by another when Gibbs was in the coma. Those are slivers of fear. Fear that is a constant companion for those who love (as I do) the men and women in positions like this. Jobs where to protect others they are sometimes left with no choice but to risk their own. Where even if the ultimate sacrifice is not required they could still be seriously injured. These slivers that pain my heart every time they walk out the door.

Today's sliver is still too fresh to write about. This one is for Jenny. She joins Kate, Pacci, Agent Cassidy, Shannon and Kelly. The slivers of those taken from us to sing with the angels too early and I have to ask how many slivers can a heart take before it breaks?


	37. Letting Go

LETTING GO.

Abby's Lab.

"No. I said _no_ McGee."  
"Abby it's time. We can't delay any longer. I'm truly sorry but we have to go."  
"No. I said no. I won't." She crosses her arms and glares at him.  
"Look I know this is hard for you." He pauses searching for the words to let her know he understands.  
"How can you possibly know?" She uncrosses her arms and begins to pace. "We've worked together for so long now. I don't want to say goodbye."  
"O.K. then you can have a bit longer."  
"I can?"  
"I knew you'd need some time to deal with this so I factored that in and came to get you early."  
She smiles at him for knowing her so well. "Thanks."  
"But when I come down next we really have to go. It's all been arranged."  
"Deal." He leaves.

NCIS Squad Room.

"Ah, Boss?"  
"Yes McGee?"  
"I've just been down with Abby and she's really upset."  
"I expected this. They did work together for a long time. When do you need to leave?"  
McGee looks at his watch. "About an hour."  
"I'll talk to her."  
"Thanks Boss." McGee lets out a heartfelt sigh as Gibbs leaves the bullpen.

Abby's Office. Just Under An Hour Later.

"What's going on Abs?"  
She looks up from her computer and he can tell from her eyes she's been crying.  
"Oh, Gibbs. I didn't think this day would ever come. I know I've said goodbye before and happily welcomed someone new but this is different."  
"I know." He'd been by her side all those other times and did know this time would be harder than most.  
"I always thought he was invincible. That he would somehow last forever. Be with us forever." She gives a weak smile. "Pretty silly of me huh?"  
"No. Just very Abby of you."  
"I..." She pauses as two workmen enter the lab then takes a deep breath before rising from her chair and walking into the lab. Gibbs walks behind her.  
"We're here to collect a mass spectrometer. To be broken up for usable parts and then disposed of. Here's the paperwork." He hands her a clipboard which she signs with a shaking hand. As they begin to box it up Abby adds. "He's not just any mass spectrometer."  
"Huh?" The workmen stop what they're doing to look up at her.  
"He was major mass spec, big daddy and he did a lot of good work around here. It's not his fault he wore out and can no longer work." They continue packing. "I can't watch this Gibbs. I know McGee and I planned to walk out with him but I just can't. I'm going to visit Ducky. Call me when it's done." She rushes from the room. As he watches her go Gibbs thinks to himself that there really was no-one quite like Abby.


	38. Abby's Grand Plan

Tag to Caught On Tape but you don't have to have seen that to understand this.

ABBY'S GRAND PLAN.

Abby's Office. Late Evening.  
"Well, I think this has been one of my worst days ever since joining NCIS."  
"Aw, poor Timmy. Were the others being mean to you?"  
"Yeah, DiNozzo had a field day with this."  
Abby is trying hard not laugh. "What did he call you?"  
"McItchy, McScratchy, McAllergy, McStrawberry, McStoplight, McRuby, McClown-nose and McFiretruck."  
Abby can't help herself and bursts out laughing.  
"Abby!"  
"Sorry, Tim but you are still really red in the face. I think this case of poison ivy is one for the record books." She grins at him as she wipes her eyes.  
"Does it still look that bad?"  
"Yep."  
"What am I going to do? I can't drive home with my hands bandaged like this and you know how Mrs Lewis next door is going to react if she sees me. I'll have her baking me cookies and bringing me herbal remedies forever."  
"No problem. You can come and stay with me for a couple of days until it all goes away."  
"I can?"  
"Sure."  
"Thanks Abby. That's really nice of you."  
"Cool." She turns away to take her jacket off the peg and to hide her grin from him. Having Tim stay with her was going to make a great first step in her grand plan to win him back.


	39. To Part

*By Abby for Kate and all those who've lost their lives in service of their country.*

TO PART.

My heart is too heavy  
With the weight of unshed tears  
Unspoken words  
Dreams never to be realised

My heart is too heavy  
With memories  
Laughter shared  
Times remembered

My heart is too heavy  
For opportunities lost  
And pain to come  
For you were taken far too soon

My heart is too heavy  
For we shall all mourn  
Knowing you are one of the fallen  
Giving of yourself  
In sacrifice for someone else

Yes, my heart is too heavy  
For we must part


	40. No Words

_Dedication - This one is going out especially to anyone who has lost someone  
through the violent actions of others. For some situations there really are no adequate words._

NO WORDS.

McGee is frowning at his computer screen as Tony strolls into the squad room.  
"Careful probie or it will stay like that."  
"Huh?" He looks up at his colleague. "Your face. If the wind changes it will be stuck like that forever."  
"There's no wind in here." McGee rolls his eyes in exasperation at Tony's childishness.  
"I'm sure frowning like that is not good for you and you know your senior field agent is always right. What ya working on anyway?"  
"I wrote a report for the director when I was working cyber crimes and he's making a presentation on it to several other agencies next week."  
"Well done."  
"Thanks. Director Vance asked me to look over it and revise certain aspects so it's not so..."  
"Geeky? Incomprehensible? Nerdy? Unintelligible to normal people?"  
"I was going to say technical."  
"Oh. You look like you need a break. The boss gave Ziva and me permission to go shooting this afternoon. You know keep our skills sharp and all that. Want to come?"  
"No, I really should stay and get this done." Ziva walks in.  
"Come on Tony. We need to get going."  
"Sure". They leave and McGee returns to his work. A short time later his concentration is again broken this time by the ringing of his phone. He picks up the handset.  
"Special agent McGee."  
"Get down here now Timmy. Right now."  
"Abby?" he questions but all he gets in response is a dial tone. He rushes from his desk down the stairs to the lab and lets out a sigh of relief as he sees Abby standing there.  
"What's up Abby?" She throws her arms around him and grips him in a tight hug. "Abby?"  
"I just had to give you a hug." Her voice is muffled as her face is pressed into his shirt.  
"Why?"She steps back. "Because I might not be able to tomorrow."  
"Are you going somewhere?"  
"No."  
"I know I'm not. At least I don't think I am. I mean if case comes in then..."  
"Timmy! Don't be so...ah... that is..." She glances at one of her computer monitors that is showing news footage of a recent mass shooting. He nods as he begins to understand. "You might not be planning on going anywhere Tim and neither am I but who knows what tomorrow may hold."  
He reaches out and puts his hands on her shoulders. "You're quite right Abby. All we can do is take it one day at a time, be there for each other and..."  
"And?"  
"Hug." As he wraps his arms around her she begins to smile and think that whatever the situation there really is no better place than the arms of a friend.


	41. The Enemy Within

*Tag to The Enemy On The Hill*

THE ENEMY WITHIN.

She's no longer sure exactly who she is. She knows what she's done and who she trusts but everything she thought she knew about herself, her past, the most important aspect of her life her family it's all been a lie. How could they do that to her? All her memories are now different. Will have to be analyzed through the prism of her new knowledge. Oh, God what will she tell her brother?

She believes in forensics, her friends, God and Gibbs and knows she'll need them all to survive. She knows they'll be there for her but how can they understand just how completely her world has been turned upside down. This is way, way beyond hinky. The rain pounds on Gibbs' roof as she snuggles into his comforting embrace and silent tears begin to run down her face.

"I'm here Abs. I'm here." As he gently rocks his friend he does not know what else to say. This was information she may well have been better off never finding out.


	42. Friends Come In All Shapes And Sizes

FRIENDS COME IN ALL SHAPES AND SIZES.

NCIS Squad Room.

Tony glances at his watch. "That's strange" he mutters as he starts to shut down his computer.  
"What is that Tony?" Ziva inquires looking up from the file she is reading.  
"I've a lunch date with Abby and she's not here yet. Normally she rushes up ten minutes before we're due to leave."  
"You are _dating _Abby?" Ziva's eyebrows shoot up.  
"No, Ziva. We're just getting together for lunch. She likes to do it on a regular basis with all of us. I'm sure she'll invite you soon."  
"She already did." Ziva smiles.  
"Good. Well I better go see what's holding her up." He walks out.

LAbby.

On entering the lab he is surprised to see the lights have been dimmed and that instead of death metal a mournful tune is reverberating around the room. "Abby?" he calls out walking through to the office. She looks up from her computer with red-rimmed eyes. "What's wrong?"  
"He died Tony. Last night." She stands up and throws her arms around him.  
"Who Abs?"  
She steps back. "He was such a good friend. Always listened to me. I know he didn't have the best start in life but I tried to make it up to him. I really did."  
"Who are you talking about?"  
"Squeakers, of course. Well his full name was Mr Squeakers but we didn't stand on formality. I knew he was sick. That's why Carol was looking after him for me so he wouldn't be alone when I had to be here."  
"Mr Squeakers?' Tony is trying very hard to keep the amusement he's feeling out of his voice.  
"He was one of the lab mice Carol and I and some friends rescued out of the science lab at college. They were all adopted out, to good homes naturally but I kept him." She sniffles.  
Tony smiles at what is such a typically Abby thing to do. "Well he wouldn't want you moping here. How about we go to lunch and you can tell me all about it and the story of the amazing Squeakers life?"  
She smiles at her friend. "You don't mind?"  
"Not at all Abs. That's what friends are for right?" She hugs him and they leave the lab arm in arm.

* * *

A/N – After watching the Princess Bride in a slightly intoxicated state at Uni a mouse (or anything furry with a tail) is probably the last animal that I would choose as a pet. However it seemed to fit Abby and this story goes out to Squeaker's owner and friend abfirechick on her sad loss. Friends really do come in all shapes and sizes.


	43. Everything And Nothing

Spoiler alert for early season nine references. It's not that I _like_ writing anxious Abby but I do like writing white knight (with so few words) Gibbs.

EVERYTHING AND NOTHING.

Striding into LAbby in response to her call the first thing he notices is that there's no music playing and then that Abby is seated at her desk hugging Bert.  
"What's wrong Abs?"  
"Nothing."  
"Nothing?"  
She slams Bert down on her desk and begins to pace the lab avoiding looking at him. "Nothing Gibbs. Nothing. I mean apart from everything. It's all wrong and everything is changing. You know I don't like change." She stops and glares at him. "Ziva and Ray, rumors Timmy might be offered a job in Japan, my family stuff, Jimmy about to be married, Mike dying. What is happening around here Gibbs? Are the planets out of alignment or something? Did someone break a mirror? It's all too much."  
"Abs."  
"What?"  
"I'm here. Whatever happens we'll deal with it together." He takes a step toward her.  
"No." She glares and steps back. "You've left before. Do not make me a promise you can't keep."  
He just stares at her for an increasingly uncomfortable minute. "You should know better Abby. I can't promise you I will always be here but you know where-ever I am if you needed me I would come."  
With a hesitant smile she steps towards him again and nods. "Yeah, I do know it. Sorry. I think the late nights on the case this week are getting to me."  
"Well come on then." He holds out an arm to her.  
"Where are we going?"  
"I'm taking you to get something to eat and then home to get some rest. Things will look brighter when you're rested."  
"But first there's something I need to do." She grins.  
"Can't it wai.." his response his cut off by a typically bone crushing hug.  
"Thanks. Now let's get out of here." She begins to gather her things.  
"Don't forget Bert."  
She picks him up and they leave the lab arm in arm.


End file.
